I have not been able to get much into the Christmas spirit this year. I have never been so unexcited for Christmas as I was this year. I finally found a little Christmas spirit on Christmas. The Christmas Eve service at church was nice, and I got to be the assisting minister and wore a robe for the first time (sweet!). Small detail: one cannot wear a hooded sweatshirt under such a robe, because the hood is lumpy and looks ridiculous. Therefore I was a bit chilly under the robe, since all I was wearing was a t-shirt, having shed the sweatshirt. Details. They can be important. It was a nice service, though, and I was glad I went and assisted. Then overall Christmas today with my family was decent too. Civil, there was laughter and enjoyment, overall pretty good. A relief. I think my favorite gift is the photo album my mother gave me that has copies of old pictures they found of my dad and grandfather. I never met this grandfather, he died when my dad was really young, but somehow those photos touched me in a way I wasn't really expecting. It was really nice to get them and they mean a lot to me, although I'm not sure I totally understand why.
The only other story I have is that I am now officially a candidate for ordained ministry in the ELCA, and having that direction, that certainty of a direction, and a new sort of hope for a future is a great thing. I am nervous, but I am excited. Maybe it has been worth it to come this far.