My roommate is a local reporter, and she writes the police blotter. She got this report the other day about a couple of stolen chickens, and then wrote this blotter for it. All true, save the rooster bit at the end.
(Seguin) -- Two local chickens have reportedly flown the coop, or perhaps they had a little help. Seguin Police reports, made Thursday, say that two "Vanny" chickens are missing from the 200 block of West Wetz Street. The chickens were last seen in the chicken house around 7 p.m. Wednesday. The chickens are valued at $10. Police reports did not include a description of the chickens or what they were wearing when they were last seen, although neighbors do say they may have seen the chickens leaving with several Roosters in hoodies from the Blanks Street area.
Wednesday, August 19, 2009
So yesterday at work these three guys come up with a cartful of electrical stuff, and I start ringing it up. I get about halfway done when one of the guys goes, "Wait, we forgot something." So I finish scanning the stuff while he disappears, and he makes it back with some electrical tape just as I finish. I add that, and tell them the price, and the guy again goes, "wait, we forgot the wire." So they say go ahead and get the next person. I save the transaction and they disappear again. After a while they come back with a roll of wire, and I'm about to add that when the other guy goes, "wait, we need two more rolls, you can't just use one." So I resave the transaction, and they disappear again. I'm starting to get irritated at this point, and think that maybe they should finish shopping before they come to the register. So they bring back some more wire, but this time one of them decides they also need a wheelbarrow. Another of the guys tries moving the cart of stuff, and we start to wonder if they're really idiots or just trying to steal some stuff, so by this time several of my coworkers also have their eyes on them. So, finally, they come back, they have wire, they have a number for a wheelbarrow, and they pay for all the stuff. It took way too long, and I really do think most of the problem was lack of intelligence, but wow.